Is it possible to calm the “Monkey mind”?

How can you calm the “monkey mind”?

We all know that feeling of too many things going through your mind so you can’t focus on just one. Often it happens in the middle of the day, but sometimes it keeps us up at night.  The thoughts just keep looping around and around.  We are thinking about the next day or even further in the future. It can be terribly distracting and cause issues with sleep.  It makes us restless and unsettled.

What is “monkey mind”?

Funny name for it, but if you think about it, it fits.  The term comes from Buddhist principles and is used to describe the inner voice that keeps chattering away to us.

We all have an inner voice – many people’s inner voice is constructive and positive.  But even constructive and positive can be overwhelming if it doesn’t stop.  My inner voice is like this.  Mostly positive, but very busy and constantly pushing me to do more. 

I find my mind is constantly planning and moving ahead which is difficult to turn off.  There are positives to this – I am definitely a doer, but it can also be too much.  I have always had difficulty “doing nothing”.  In fact, I really don’t know what that means!  My husband jokes that I am like a shark, that if I stop moving I will die.  It’s not quite that bad, but I do always feel the need to be active.  My brain doesn’t stop until I close my eyes to sleep and then I am out – likely because I’m exhausted!

Unfortunately for some of us, this inner voice or “monkey mind” is negative.  I can’t imagine how tough it would be to constantly have negative self-talk in my mind.  It must be horribly difficult.  I know some people suffer from this daily; and suffer is the correct word.

There really are ways to calm your mind that do work.  I have been working on applying them to my own life over the past 18 months with some progress. 

If you have children, you likely have read about teaching your children to self-soothe.  Some little ones use a blanket or their thumb to calm themselves.  This is a skill that unfortunately so many of us lose as we get older- sucking your thumb is kind of frowned upon past 2 years old!  We forget how to self soothe and can no longer calm ourselves or our minds.  But it is still a necessary skill that adults need to re-learn.

We’ve all heard the buzz words “mindfulness” and “being present”.  Unfortunately, we now hear these terms so much they’ve completely lost their meaning.  And their importance.

For real though, we are all totally overstimulated by our daily lives.  The monkey mind will always be there (clearly if the Buddhists have always had a term for it).  But it has gotten worse for most people with the constant stimulation of cell phones, television and 24/7 access to information.  To get technical, our parasympathetic nervous system is unable to rest.  It needs this rest to keep us calm and to heal our body.  It is more important than ever that we learn how to control the monkey mind.

Does meditation work?

It does, but it’s not easy to do.  I hear from people all the time that they can’t do it because they can’t sit still – fairly ironic because that is exactly why they need to meditate!  Circular logic really, you need to start sitting still to learn how to better sit still.

We have an idea in our mind what meditation looks like, right?  Someone sitting cross-legged on a pillow with their hands on their knees breathing slowly.  But it doesn’t have to be sitting on a pillow in silence while concentrating on breathing.  Can it be this?  Of course, it can.  But it doesn’t have to be. 

During my yoga instructor training, we committed to 6 weeks of daily meditation, and it is not an exaggeration to say that it has changed my life.  I stayed with it long after the 6 weeks were finished.  The result is that I feel calmer and yes, I have learned how to slow my mind.  I have learned how to control my breath and match my breath to my movement, as well as how to sit in stillness.  All things I couldn’t do well before.  I love hearing from people that I appear so calm and collected.

This type of meditation may not work for everyone though.

I also learned in my training that meditation can take many forms, including gardening or hiking or running.  It could be watching the ocean or the clouds in the sky.  Basically, anything that concentrates your attention on the activity you are doing. 

Sounds funny right?  But haven’t you ever gotten so engrossed in an activity that you weren’t thinking about anything BUT the activity?

  That’s the idea.

The trick here though is you do have to unplug – no music, no podcasts, just the sound of your feet on the ground or the ocean waves crashing on the beach.  The repetition of the movement or the sound is calming and meditative. 

This is mindfulness. This is being present.

Give it a go.  Your mind and body will thank you for it.