Empty Nester Holidays- It doesn’t quite feel like Christmas…yet

This is my first holiday season as an empty nester – my boys are both away at college – and it feels different. 

They will be home mid-month after finals, but since this season stretches from Thanksgiving to Christmas, they will be absent for much of the prep and lead up.  It really doesn’t feel like December without kids in the house after so many years.  To be honest, this whole fall has felt just a bit off.

My boys attend school an hour away and my oldest has his car, so they are able to join us for the annual trek to the Christmas tree farm and will help put the tree and lights up this weekend. But then they are going back to school for finals and the house will be empty again for a few weeks.  Much of the magic has left the season as the kids have grown, but I’m really hoping to figure out how to get some back.

I remembered to put up the Halloween and fall decorations in September this year.  Our decorations include lots of indoor pumpkins, a fall wreath, and a number of other Halloween items.  We even bought a small pumpkin for the front porch and put up the wooden outdoor pumpkin and cat.  The pumpkin was never carved and looked a little sad by itself, but we did have a pumpkin (it is still sitting there by the way).  This year Halloween came and went, and I was at the gym.  There was no help with costumes, driving to trick or treating, or digging through candy afterward to pick out the Almond Joys.  It’s definitely not the same.  I found myself thinking that next year most of the decorations are going to stay packed up.  I don’t think my husband even notices them.

We usually have a tremendously busy holiday season mostly with baking and shopping and our yearly traditions.  My youngest son and I make all the Christmas cookies, there are even a few he likes to bake himself.  This year I’ve started the dough without him (I asked!), so we aren’t stressed when he gets home.  I pulled out the December calendar to try to schedule all of the events everyone still wants to do into a compressed schedule.  If anyone is wondering where I am during late December into early January, it is likely we will be at a train garden, arboretum, or baking something.

Change is tough, even when it’s for positive things.  We’ve done alright with the empty, quieter house, but it is a bit challenging to get into the holiday spirit this year.  All the decorations come out this weekend, including the tree, so that will bring some merriment.  I love the white lights on the tree at nighttime.  This year will force a change in perspective and a change in traditions and expectations.  This is not easy, but I’m working on making the transition gracefully. 

But I do know I will be extra thankful this year when my kids descend on the house excited to be home and excited for the holidays. 

I think then it will begin to look a lot more like Christmas.